The Diary Of A CEO with Steven Bartlett

Her New York Times bestselling books include, 'Maybe You Should Talk To Someone' and 'Mr Good Enough'.

And as I read through your book Rebel Rising which is out now I was surprised in many ways but also the person that I'd seen on a screen made sense in a bunch of different ways.

I think some of my darkness comes this is a quote from your book I think some of my darkness comes from my dad there is definitely convict history on that side of my family a lot of dodginess.

And then it's often our light side is often created by our dark side in many respects yeah so I see shades of what I would guess was your dark side in those early years of your um story but when you say that your dark side probably came from your father what are you referring to.

So I kind of feel like um that I have friends in the industry right who have had like quite awesome childhoods and you know and and to me sometimes in their work they come across as very vanilla and then I was thinking about I go why aren't they as interesting or something and they're great and they're talented but they're just not as interesting and I normally when I gchat to them you find out oh they have two loving parents and they had a great childhood um and so for me I think why I have certain parts of my personality and like to do comedy and stuff because I have this I have a lightness which definitely comes from my mum and my mum's side of the family that are all like that and then on my dad's side it's just like dodginess everywhere and like yeah like uh I don't you know alcoholism and like addictions and um and and just also a mentality of just I don't know how to explain it best apart from saying it's a bit dodgy but in a way and then sometimes when uh I mean I don't suffer from like actual depression or whatever but then sometimes if you're feeling like you know oh you know uh sometimes I it feels like a mafia sensation when you're like oh I want to get revenge on those people or something you know uh we are like shocked of where these feelings come from and they're normally from the dark side um but if I didn't have that I don't think I'd be as interesting as a as a person or as a performer um and I definitely like have sometimes have an edginess to jokes and stuff which I guess I wouldn't have had if I if I didn't have you know one side of the family be be a bit dodgy um and the other side be light so I knew I knew the difference and I knew I kind of had both but you can embody both and that's quite interesting.

When I wrote The Automatic Millionaire 20 years ago, two things have happened since then. The stock market has gone up 600%.

The Automatic Millionaire, A Powerful One-Step Plan to Live and Finish Rich.

In my first book, which is the evolutionary basis of consumption, and then in The Consuming Instinct, I argue that there are four key Darwinian mechanisms that drive much of our purpose of behavior.

in the happiness book. So I argue, I predict, although I haven't tested it, that what will predict the likelihood of a couple staying together into the future is whether their mating, overall mating scores stay in line or they begin to diverge.

In The Consuming Instinct, your other book, chapter four, that younger siblings like me, youngest of four, are more likely to be creative.

This is a sentence I never thought I'd say in my life. We've just hit 7 million subscribers on YouTube and I want to say a huge thank you to all of you that show up here every Monday and Thursday to watch our conversations from the bottom of my heart but also on behalf of my team who you don't always get to meet.

And so that's what that's what sent me on my journey to eventually write The Parasitic Mind 30 plus years ago.

When I lectured this in front of radical feminists, they'll come up, Dr. Saad, you're such a brilliant scientist.

In my academic work, the mere fact of saying that we're biological beings was the most triggering thing.

In my public engagement work, that's not directly related to my science. Well, it's a very long list, hence The Parasitic Mind.

And let's break them down very simply. First, Dr Gad, what are the ideas that you've shared that have got you in the most trouble?

In your book you talk about a mate desirability score.

one of the things I argue in the happiness book is yes, make sure to meet someone who matches you and your mating value and work hard at making sure that you stay at the right mating value.

So I argue, I predict, although I haven't tested it, that what will predict the likelihood of a couple staying together into the future is whether their mating, overall mating scores stay in line or they begin to diverge.

So in the Happiness Book, I have an entire chapter whereby I argue that everything in life, the number one universal rule of optimal flourishing is to find the sweet spot irrespective of any context that you're talking about.

I love uh I love the movie uh well not the movie the book American Gods it became a TV show.

When I was reading the principles in your book, Never Split the Difference, I could relate it to my romantic relationships and business negotiations.

And you've got your book as well, which we've talked about a bit, which is Never Split the Difference, which is sold more than 2 million copies worldwide, which is just staggering.

Thank you for writing such a great book on a topic that is relevant to more than just FBI negotiations... it sold more than 2.5 million copies worldwide.

But my interview with Prince Harry I had a gut feeling all along That I shouldn't agree to do the interview

When you read his book You can see why And people couldn't understand How this is possible How could somebody so privileged That the very apex of society In gilded palaces be traumatized

His father touches Harry on the knee And says, but it'll be okay And leaves the room This 12-year-old, nobody held him

Harry was a traumatized child He was told about his mother's death That it was an accident Your mother didn't make it

You can order Dr Ramani's most recent book, 'It's Not You: How to Identify and Heal from NARCISSISTIC People', here: https://amzn.to/42YI79K

I think it's talked about, but not even talked about enough, is Gary Chapman's five love languages. It seems so simple, but it literally changed my marriage. I bought Dr. Gary Chapman's five love languages, right?

Richard, you wrote a book called 'Of Boys and Men', why the modern male is struggling and why it matters and what to do about it. Of all the things you could have done, why? Why did you do this?

I was warned so strongly against it by my colleagues, by friends, by professionally. Just saying, this is such a difficult subject to write about, particularly right now in this sort of moment we're in culturally.

I'm provocative, so I provoke responses, but then I'm kind of upset at the responses. And actually this work around boys and men is not intended at all to be provocative. Ironically, I'm trying to make it less provocative.

The hardest thing you've ever done as a man is couples therapy. Why?

You seem to think the problem is that you're not feminist enough. The problem is that you're not masculine enough.

it is also worth reading the book he wrote before that, The Real Anthony Fauci