Thou Shall Prosper Ten Commandments for Making Money

Rabbi is an Orthodox Jewish Rabbi and the book Thou Shall Prosper is his main or the book that made you with your help well it's a fabulous book it's one of my top 10 faves of all time and so I ended up writing the foreword when you reissued it later integrating your family finances faith and friendship and fitness sadly came out October the 8th by an Orthodox Jewish Rabbi after October the 7th really bad timing Rabbi awfully bad timing you know you can't rely on Hamas to get anything right okay I'm with you on that I like it so good stuff so you taught us in Thou Shall Prosper basically to not be ashamed of earning as a result of serving I think one of my favorite quotes was if you do a good job for folks in business they give you certificates of appreciation with President's faces on them and so you've written a lot of best-selling books about money and business and other practical life lessons that are woven all through there from the Hebrew and I've had a lot of common ground a lot of wonderful discussions fireside and over dinners with our wives and everything else we've just become great friends so what is it that the holistic you goes into that you haven't done in these other books

It's the 30,000 foot view it's zooming out a little bit and relating to the idea of the system it's not as if these are separate components in just the same way nobody would say your heart is one thing and your liver is something else and your lungs are something else you go into your heart specialist and say look this is what you need take this medicine it's great it's going to wreck and our lives are very much like that we had a woman who became a coaching client of ours who came to us because she said she's done everything right she did really well at college she got into the business school of her choice she focused she graduated top in business administration she came out with a really great MBA and that alerted her to the fact that there's something real going wrong what's going wrong is that while some of her colleagues were attending birthday parties or celebrations connecting with other people building up their own personalities in the final analysis when you interview somebody for a job you're not just looking at grades and GPAs from college you're looking at the result of everything that you have done with your life because everything you do contributes to making you who you are so here's a girl who was terrific very accomplished but only unidimensionally she was excellent academically she could do a bond yield analysis in her head she was really good but her relational IQ was just not there she couldn't talk about anything else she didn't have any hobbies she didn't have any interest she'd really deliberately neglected all the other aspects of her life

That's why we condensed the complexity of a human life into the five fundamentals of family finance faith fitness and friendships one of the things that Rachel I do a lot of controversial things as you know I'm shocked I preach financial heresy all the time to the financial Pharisees out there but Rachel is not as nearly as controversial she's more likable people love Rachel but the one thing that she gets the most hate on is when she suggests dares to suggest that couples combine their finances and not run them separately she actually used a phrase pretty similar to what you've used here in the book that if you can share a bed you can share a bank account she's exactly right yes and we go further we say you have to we do too that's absolutely essential yes so walk through that because we talk about this a lot why is it so essential even just two segments ago we had the exact call we get this call once or twice a show sometimes about a spouse and it's becoming not only are fewer and fewer people getting married now but many who are getting married aren't acting like it are acting and also aren't sure whether they're roommates or married yeah that's what I mean they're not acting like they're married there's a proliferation of lawyers drawing up prenup contracts I mean that's a fine way to go into a marriage and again if it's a second marriage or third marriage and there are lots of assets and children complexities exist but ordinarily when a young couple marries you would have thought it would be with a wholehearted bonding we're not talking roommates okay this is really really important stuff

And the reason is that you have to share the bank account as well as the bed and frankly leaving one is just as ridiculous as omitting the other but the reason there is because there's something very different about how men and women typically relate to money not that a woman doesn't enjoy earning money not that a woman can't be particularly good at her career and excel at it but it doesn't do anything directly to her sexual feminine identity when a man makes money it is a very intrinsic masculine related thing to him and the evidence of that of course is the reverse unfortunately we've seen places regions where steel as an industry has collapsed and one of the things we know unfortunately is that when a male loses the capacity to earn money loses a job heaven forbid there is almost inevitably a sexual dysfunction that accompanies that it's almost inevitable never with a woman when a woman loses a job it doesn't it's painful it's problematic she's worried she's embarrassed but it doesn't hurt but the way money is identified with us is different

And so learning to work as a team though is crucial in the unity exactly and I think it's important to say hey we we both are in this together and we are coming at it wholeheartedly into this marriage so every part of our marriage to your point from my health the way I want to raise my kids all of that has to be in line with my husband right and together we see it and we're a team I've got to say maybe as many of the people who get upset when you speak about these things are people who've almost lost contact with their essential feminine natures and it's easy to do but it's hard to get in touch with masculine natures and become incapable a lot of you know a lot of the people in the news on campuses today are right there do you see the because I do hear from specifically on the women's side of hearing this message if something happens I have to make sure that I protect myself it's almost this fear elements there

Rabbi Lapin talks about that in his book...if you're doing something that's psychologically incompatible with your belief system, it's very difficult to be good at it.

Ten Commandments.

Even as a child, I believed that when I died, the whole world of my existence would disappear with me. My world would last only as long as I did. I was convinced that I had arisen out of nothingness and in the final analysis, omnipotent nothingness was Lord of all creation. We have nothing to hope for beyond what we are capable of creating in the time we have allotted to us. Nevertheless, in the final analysis, all things crumble away into the nothingness, which is at the beginning and end of creation.