Six Degrees of Separation A Play

Well later on we'll might regale us with a story, I have a good one for us, okay really, we'll get we'll get we tell us now, is it okay, wait, are you gonna finish the point, no, I guess no, we don't derail Michelle really, no it's fine, well tell us, okay so uh so as as you all now know my name is will Smith and something very strange happened to me recently where the famous will Smith who is making a new movie for Netflix called Bright, Bright yes, he gets on where it's a buddy cop film where his cop with his buddy is a fairy, he's an orc, an orc, yes, it's kind of like bad boys meets like Dungeons and Dragons races or something, it's a Netflix movie yeah, that was dark to me, hey, but they spent 90 million dollars in this movie so it wasn't 90 million, so it wasn't exactly dark, it was a well right, how are we not getting this Netflix money every day, I asked, well there's more money where that came from yeah, so this shit gets really weird uh so he gets on the social medias and says will smith, will smith the famous one, he gets on the social medias and says hey guys, I'm doing this new movie for Netflix and they want me to do all this promotional material and it's too much stuff and I can't handle it all so I need everyone whose name is will smith to get in touch with us below and I'm like it's on because my entire life literally my entire life has been a series of bad will Smith jokes so I email them or I get in touch on Twitter and they asked me to send them an email, Netflix does so I email them, we go back and forth a couple of times and they say hey, send us a short video with some fun facts about yourself, so I do and I challenged the famous will smith to a duel in the video because you know, this all these bad jokes, I have to defend my honor, there can be only one, you would kill him etc, I mean I don't know if I would actually kill him, you know, you might like do the the honorable gentleman thing and shoot into the air or whatever, whatever anyway, can I just interrupt by saying you really are going somewhere with us and I'm respecting it, I know this is a good story, I mean I know this is one of the weirdest things that's ever happened to me, I've never met you and it's not what I was expecting, I'm just gonna always speaks with intention unlike unlike us, yes, unlike us, every word is a marble carved statue, yes, is a cobblestone that leads somewhere, yes okay, oh my, they get back to me after I send the video in and they say hey we really like that and we want to talk to you more about it but uh, you need to sign this release form so I signed the release, big mistake uh, it wasn't really because they invited me to the premiere of Brighton LA and they flew me out and put me up for the premiere that looks money, they said you're going to be walking down the red carpet with many other will smiths including the famous will smith, oh my god, this turned out to be like 30 to 50 will smiths, oh my god, the famous one, oh my god, all of us staying in the same hotel and all of us going to the same event and it was totally bizarre, that's not funny, it was hilarious, this was like a few days ago what, yeah, this is a hot breaking press story, my picture was on jimmy kimmel yeah, it was pretty weird, wait, did you meet will, I did, I got to shake his hand, but there were so many of us and I didn't even talk to him and then he ran off and then they put all the will smiths in a separate theater for the premiere, yes, they did, they put us in a separate theater wow, and the after party which is funny because they had at first like shoehorned us into the VIP after party area when we were getting ready to like go out and you know meet famous will smith on the on the red carpet and they shepherded us into the VIP red carpet area or red VIP party area and afterward, the after party, we didn't even go to that one, they had a separate one for all of the will smiths, I guess that's not to me was infuriating because you know I am an audio engineer and I wanted to talk to people from Netflix about all their original content audio for post all this kind of stuff, you know what it says to me, they did not run criminal background checks on all the will smiths and they couldn't risk it, there that was too expensive, like we're just oh my god, where would you rank yourself in the attractiveness of the will smiths invited, well that depends on my self-worth on any given, you are will's very attractive, well that's why i'm asking, otherwise I'd be able to rank me in relation to I don't know what the other will smiths look like, but I'd say you're up there, can you bring can you pull up a picture of the, I can't pull up the picture, I actually am so curious, I met will smith once many many moons ago, my very first job out of only about two years ago, but my first job out of college many moons oh wait here they are oh my god, there's too many wow, yeah, there were a lot of us, this looks like a white like a disgusting frat like oh my god, they told us cocktail attire so everyone wore some tacky suit, I have to tell you something, 90 percent of these ones are true monsters, I don't see where you here, I'm on the right side, not looking at the camera, is this you because yeah oh, you look very handsome, rock and roll honestly, I'm like I'm not hitting on you, top three hottest, top three hot, I really mean that, but well, I feel like it was all such a transparent marketing ploy moment thing, but also like so masturbatory, a I like it, why this movie, why did will smith choose this movie to do this, I don't know, I mean he must have, this must have been on his mind for a long time, I mean how many of us can there be, thousands right, I'm going to change my name to Jada pink it's myth or when she does it, not funny, you mentioned it, there was another will smith from New York who is the he was the manager for the Yankees little or the Yankees minor league team oh, who had a wife named Jada, that's crazy, that is not yeah, they were like totaled like New Jersey, New York, what's the what is the deal with those two, will and Jada yeah, David cabbage don't find out, wait, tell us about this about your thing so I heard they escaped Scientology by the way, but you go all right okay, but if anyone really does, but I guess yeah, well I mean we'll get to their deal in a minute, basically I was working the sci-fi channel waiting for people to be impressed, wow, my first job at a college also first job I ever outfired from about two months later, but my last for doing nothing like literally, but also like I didn't do anything wrong, but I also didn't do anything because no one taught me what to do and then I was literally like William Shatner recall and I would be like I don't know how to help you at all right, sorry and they were like you need to go, but anyways I did get a free trip to LA out of it and we were staying at the Ritz Carlton in Pasadena which now is the Langham and there was uh, I think Sugar Ray was getting married like the weekend it was for the TCA whatever it is and and so he was the best man and he was in a will was the best man to yes, after Ali oh oh Sugar right, we both mark my graph right, but mark my graph no no no no sugar Ray I got so am really laughing yeah sugar ray and there were no condoms and everybody was like we want condoms oh my god no so he was walking at the steps now this is all these girls that I worked with and he was so gorgeous I have to say I mean he's gorgeous like he's oh yeah and he's fucking beautiful, beautiful, beautiful and um and he went so charming he went good morning, good morning to all of us oh well and literally we stood there not one of us said a word yeah, we didn't say anything, I've never had that happen and he kept walking and then we fully it was like in love actually when Laura Linney makes out with the model we were like stomping our feet and then I called my mom right later and I was like mommy Mel Smith and like we didn't say and you know it's like oh my god it was so great and then we didn't say anything because we were so like terrified and she went oh so what he he shits like you he shits like you so what oh my god she can't impress her can I do this please do and that's oh no but that's that Floridian mom and can I say Jewish Israeli mom speaking no it's great I will later, I want you to do the monologue from six degrees of separation if you know what, really make my next such a good book.

I will later I want you to do the monologue from six degrees of separation if you know what really make my next such a good book